Goodbye Black Clothes: A Love Poem ?

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Goodbye black clothes,
Wherever you are.
Trapped in my closet,
The trunk of my car?

Goodbye black clothes,
That I’ve tucked away.
The depths of my drawers,
In bins, where I can’t say.

Goodbye black clothes,
That collect all my flakes.
I’ll never see you,
On one of my dates.

Goodbye black clothes,
I’ve loved you so much.
Your smell from the dryer,
Your soft, gentle touch.

Goodbye black clothes,
It’s great when it lasts.
Too bad I have skin,
Covered in plaques.

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Table For 3!: My Date, My Psoriasis and Me.

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So I have a date the other night but my scalp had other plans. It was beginning to look A LOT like Christmas and I had a few hours to get ready! Is my dog sick and I need to cancel? Did I injure myself and need to reschedule? Do I wear a hat and cover some of my face on our first date? UGHHHHH.

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No, Brittany! You’re going to woman up and figure this out. O.K., so my first problem was that there was no way I could leave my hair down. It was obviously flaky and I DIDN’T want to flake on this date (literally – in both ways) so that was out. Ponytail? Meh, I can’t really pull it off, PLUS, it shows the terrible amount of flaky build-up all around the frame of my face. SIGH… Wouldn’t it be great if I had bangs? Eureka!!!

Faux bangs! They’re cute enough with a little, messy bun but can be sexy too. Done.

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First, I brushed out my hair and applied some hair oil to my scalp. You can use any. I have about ten varieties.

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Second, I starting curling sections of my hair, bit by bit.

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Third… I already have side bangs but they are long-ish. It doesn’t matter how long your hair is, just take a section of the front like you would see on someone who has bangs, make sure its even and push back the rest of your hair so it’s out of the way. I twisted the “bang” part and put a little clip on it to hold it in place.

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Fourth, after you twist the little section you want to be your bangs- pull them up towards the back of your head. Stop when the bottom of the bangs reaches the length you want. I left mine in my eyes a little so I could curl them just a tad and mess them up. Pin them back with bobby pins and try and get them as close to your scalp as possible so you don’t have an odd bump.

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Last but not least, I threw my hair up into a curly, messy bun with some pins. Tossed a little hairspray into it. Moved some pieces around for a messy, sexy look and voila! No Psoriasis in site. For tonight.

And while I know this is not a long term solution for your scalp psoriasis, it did get me to and through the date.

Mission Accomplished.

#MyInvisibleFight : 30 Things About My Invisible Illness

“Be kind, For everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle.” -Plato

It’s Invisible Illness Awareness Week (September 28 – October 4) and I’m encouraging everyone with an Invisible Illness to stand up and stand out!

As most of you know, I was diagnosed with Severe Plaque Psoriasis only a few years ago. I try to keep my blog posts light and happy but the truth is, it can be a crippling illness.

When I learned that I would have Psoriasis for THE REST OF MY LIFE I broke down. I sat in bed with my computer open, reading other peoples blogs, for days and cried. Seems silly but it was a huge blow for me. At the time I was COVERED in spots that varied from dry and flaky to sore and bloody. My scalp, my ears, my eyebrows, my neck, my arms and legs, my torso… everything… covered. The only things pretty clear were the palms of my hands and feet and the center of my face (aside from my eyebrows). The hot water burnt my skin and made me bleed, sleeping was impossible because I was consumed by open wounds and sores and the slightest move was painful, my scalp just had CHUNKS of dry skin that i picked constantly… i picked it so much, i wondered if i was picking through my skull! I was tired, I was in pain, I was miserable, people were disgusted by me (even if they didn’t say so), I love to cook but avoided the kitchen because I knew no one would eat anything I made (I would hesitate to eat anything someone who looked like me made!)… it was awful. I saw NO END to my illness and technically there IS NO END; this is something I will have for the rest of my LIFE. But I’m only in my 20’s! I’m single! Who’s going to want to date me??? How can I get jobs like this??? My life was at an all time low. Even the lotions and creams that soothed my skin temporarily had to be saran wrapped on and were sticky and messy and smelly. I saw no end to this…

But I looked at Brooklyn, my little wonder pup, and thought “hm, this little life depends on me and loves me and wags her tail no matter what I look like…” So I started SeeingPspots to vent, to motivate, to help people like me who were in bed reading about their psoriasis for the first time. I decided to be PRO-ACTIVE instead of IN-ACTIVE. Yes, this is a lifelong battle for me. Yes, it’s gonna suck sometimes. But I revel in my skin when it’s clear and I do the VERY BEST at being positive when it’s not. We are ALL fighting battles of various proportions… be the best version of you, always. ❤

30 Things About My Invisible Illness You May Not Know

1. The illness I live with is: Severe Plaque Psoriasis
2. I was diagnosed with it in the year: 2014
3. But I had symptoms since: 2013
4. The biggest adjustment I’ve had to make is: Accepting the person underneath the skin
5. Most people assume: I am being vain and am not actually suffering
6. The hardest part about mornings are: Facing the day and being positive when I am sad or don’t want to look in a mirror
7. My favorite medical TV show is: House
8. A gadget I couldn’t live without is: My Phone
9. The hardest part about nights are: Sleeping
10. Each day I take 5 or 6 pills & vitamins. (No comments, please)
11. Regarding alternative treatments I: Try everything and am a huge advocate of treating your insides the way you want your outsides to look like
12. If I had to choose between an invisible illness or visible I would choose: I wouldn’t change a thing
13. Regarding working and career: My illness has certainly morphed what I want to do with my life in a positive way
14. People would be surprised to know: not much… I’m an open book.
15. The hardest thing to accept about my new reality has been: that people are vain and when I’m not pretty on the outside the amount of people who want to be around me decreases significantly
16. Something I never thought I could do with my illness that I did was: wear a bathing suit again!
17. The commercials about my illness: make me a little angry. They can be inaccurate. They show the elation of the patient AFTER being clear but not how we feel PRIOR to clear skin.
18. Something I really miss doing since I was diagnosed is: sleeping better
19. It was really hard to have to give up: crappy food. But I allow cheat days =)
20. A new hobby I have taken up since my diagnosis is: Blogging ❤
21. If I could have one day of feeling normal again I would: Right now I am pretty clear, so I do whatever I can: cook, work out, take hot showers… little things my skin doesn’t permit when it’s in super flare up mode.
22. My illness has taught me: to not judge a book by it’s cover. The happiest people are sometimes fighting the largest battles.
23. Want to know a secret? One thing people say that gets under my skin is: grammatical errors
24. But I love it when people: point out MINE lol
25. My favorite motto, scripture, quote that gets me through tough times is: saying the “Hail Mary” prayer
26. When someone is diagnosed I’d like to tell them: I PROMISE, it is going to be O.K.!!! and give them a (gentle) hug
27. Something that has surprised me about living with an illness is: that I am stronger under pressure and adversity
28. The nicest thing someone did for me when I wasn’t feeling well was: love me anyway
29. I’m involved with Invisible Illness Week because: I believe in spreading awareness for my illness
30. The fact that you read this list makes me feel: special =) THANK YOU!! ❤